Rozhovor s Benem, který se narodil v Litvě, ale v dětství se s rodinou přestěhoval za novým životem do Londýna, o nových začátcích a lepších zítřcích.
Rozhovor s Benem, který se narodil v Litvě, ale v dětství se s rodinou přestěhoval za novým životem do Londýna, o nových začátcích a lepších zítřcích.
Welcome to the English-speaking podcast on this hill. My name is Pavlina and every week I will talk to my parents about the different interesting topics of the whole English-speaking world. And that's all from me. Thank you very much for watching this video. We can start. If you like this podcast and would like to support it, you can use Patreon at patreoncom.
Speaker 2:Hi everybody, and welcome to today's episode. We have to say that you are originally Lithuanian. That's where you were born, right Hence the name.
Speaker 3:Yes, probably it's not even Ben. It would be Benas.
Speaker 2:Benas drabavichus.
Speaker 3:Yeah, rolls of the tongue.
Speaker 2:And now you're actually talking to me from London, your current home, or your home just in general. Right, that's where I am right now. And well, today we're going to be talking about you becoming British, if that's how you can call it.
Speaker 3:I'm fine with the name. I don't think I'll ever become actually British, let alone have a passport. They won't let me have the passport, so it's a big issue.
Speaker 2:Oh, really, I didn't know that.
Speaker 3:Lithuania would be like give back our passport now. You can't have too.
Speaker 2:Lithuania doesn't allow two passports.
Speaker 3:Doesn't have dual citizenship, so I basically I need to be either a basketball player, a politician or, like a person who puts the country on the map. It's like they scratch my back, I'll scratch theirs, type thing. It's bizarre.
Speaker 2:It's very bizarre. Well, yeah, so we have to say so. You actually came to London when you were nine years old. Am I right in thinking that?
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, I was nine, which is before my birthday, and yeah, yeah. So I've been here since how many years, I don't know. Whatever years that makes, like 17, maybe now.
Speaker 2:So what was the reason behind the whole move of your family from Lithuania to the UK?
Speaker 3:Yeah, well, I'd say, obviously the first and foremost is probably economic reasons Then I mean, this is 2005. So Lithuania, just soon as Lithuania joined the European Union, we were coming here. Yeah, so it was pretty much opportunity based economic reasons, because Lithuania, well, yeah, lithuania was just was a bit of a barren land back in the day. I'm sure it's gotten better since, but yeah, obviously and as a nine year old you don't really get a say in, you know where you stay on and who gets to make money or whatever but I wouldn't say that I willingly came here, because when I first came here, came here was more of a. I thought it's a holiday. I wasn't told I'm going to live here. So essentially it's good, nothing.
Speaker 2:Oh, holiday for the next 20 years.
Speaker 3:Yeah, because it was like I thought I'm coming here for like two weeks because my mom was already living here. But, basically, I thought I was coming here to just check the place out, you know, scope it out for. And then two weeks later they were like oh yeah, so we need to like, enroll you into a school.
Speaker 1:And I was like oh yeah, we stay in here.
Speaker 3:Okay, bizarre feeling back then, but you know I never really put too much value on it. I was just okay, cool. So it's a new school now.
Speaker 2:So you were okay with your parents decision. You weren't like, oh, this was a treason. Like I want to go back home to my friends and everything I mean it's a big change for a kid.
Speaker 3:Yeah, no, it's massive change because, like, hey, it was, it was a language I didn't know, so you know, and such multiculturalism in this country, whereas Lithuania it just didn't exist, back then at least. So everything was, everything was a shift, Absolutely. So essentially I knew that I didn't have a choice, so I was like that's just kind of roll with the punches and kind of see the good side of it.
Speaker 2:I have to say, because I've known you for the past I don't know how many years and you are very relaxed, chilled out person. So I guess that's why your parents decided to do it this way rather than yeah, and they knew that you would be fine with it. But possibly I don't- know, Maybe not every kid would take it so well.
Speaker 3:Well, in my family there's like three other siblings. They did not. They did not like it at all. A lot of them were like plotting their escape, in a way to go back. But yeah, I don't know, I kind of just went with it, mainly because it was exciting. For a bit I was like I said new school and stuff, but also terrifying Because as a kid I don't think you kind of look at your. You know I'll be here for the next 10 years. You're like well.
Speaker 3:I'm here now. What's next? Kind of thing you take that step at a time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and so do you remember the first moment that you actually realized okay, so this is going to be my new home.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I do remember that one which was just around around the time they were like we need to enroll you into a school. That's when I was like, oh, I'm going to be cemented here for a while. So, like again, that feeling was was fine, it wasn't, you know, it wasn't like a dramatic thing. I think the more dramatic thing came later, which was to actually go to school and speak in the language You've only heard on friends TV show badly dubbed. You were watching friends when you were nine years old, early. I was watching friends when I was like maybe six.
Speaker 3:It was like late at night.
Speaker 2:I was thinking of some good show I watched. I watched Latin American soap opera. It was a big thing back in the days in the Czech Republic.
Speaker 3:Same with Lithuania. Yeah, they would come just after. They would come on just after Simpsons around four o'clock and that's where my grandma and you know that demographic kind of sits down and just like takes over TV until like late at night.
Speaker 2:I was watching with my grandma too, the whole, like Esmeralda and Rosalinda.
Speaker 3:Great names there.
Speaker 2:Anyway, so so you just said that you didn't know any English. So so how was that? How did you cope?
Speaker 3:Yeah, coping was fine until I had to go to school. And I still remember my first day of school where they kind of introduced me as, like, obviously the new kid because I joined. I joined what would have been March, so just after like they spent half a year in school, so everybody knew each other by then from previous years, because I joined in year five. That makes a nice difference if you know those, whatever that means.
Speaker 2:I mean you start school when you're five years old, right in the UK, so fifth grade, let's say.
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly, exactly so. Yeah, so I got introduced to the whole class and everyone's kind of like saying hi, but I was too shy to even say hi and to I didn't know any English to even say anything back. So that first day I kind of spent yeah, I spent very much as a mute and that happened for like another week or something like that, which was, yeah, it was. You end up doing a lot of people watching you. You kind of scope the place out and stuff, see who you know who the buddies are, who just who just generally everyone is. Yeah, I think that kind of informed my lady's life where I would just end up doing a lot of people watching, just like cafes and stuff.
Speaker 3:Yes it was an interesting thing, but I think it took me maybe two weeks to actually get start. I picked up English pretty quickly, at least the basics of it, yeah. So I think two weeks later, or something like that, I was actually having Well in my head I was having a good conversation, but I'm pretty sure I sound like an idiot.
Speaker 2:Wow, but then? So that means that did you do everything in English, I suppose, like you know all the subjects and everything, exactly.
Speaker 3:So because you, yeah, uk is pretty so multicultural, you can actually send your kids to the country you're from. So essentially could go to a Lithuanian school, which quite a few of my Lithuanian friends actually did, but my mom specifically didn't want to do that because obviously the best way to learn I know a language is actually just immerse yourself into it. So, yeah, it was. Everything was in English. I didn't know. I didn't know what the subjects were that I was doing, because obviously the names were different art, don't know what the fuck was that. You know, how do you say art in Lithuanian?
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, that doesn't sound even like remotely close.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, I had to just ask what everything was. I Remember not actually knowing what cucumber was, and I was actually made fun of that for some reason, because apparently everyone in fifth grade, everyone knew what cucumber was. So I was, you know, left out. Oh god, no, somebody said, I think somebody was a yeah, I think a kid was trying to describe another kid I don't think it was me, but I'm trying to describe him as cool, as a cucumber. And I was like, okay, I think I know what cool means, because you kind of hear it in every language in some shape or form. But I was like what is that other thing, cucumber? And then that's when the laughing started. Yeah, I think the most important thing during that such whatever Situation you find yourself in, but it's just to ask questions and you know you will feel funny kind of way, but just kind of like not care and just keep going.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but now that you've lived in the UK for almost 20 years, oh, do you feel more English or more Lithuanian, or a bit of both?
Speaker 3:Neither. Yeah, it's an odd one to describe because, for example, I don't particularly feel Lithuanian, mainly because I I maybe I'll go back there once a year. And you don't particularly feel British either, because not all the cultural norms you take on like you know, still not into like fish and chips, all that much.
Speaker 2:I am and I'm not British at all.
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly so for some people it works, but I feel like I'm somewhere in between. And then, which kind of like again puts you in a weird spot, because you know, when you think of like where would you, I don't know, maybe settle down or like you know, these questions do get asked and stuff and you can't really pick a place. Yeah, to answer your question, I would say neither of those things. But you know, I don't feel like, I don't feel Chinese or whatever. I just don't put a lot, of, a lot of value on identity, in a sense.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah and well, so what is it that you like the most about Brits? British people Interesting Good question If there is something that you actually like.
Speaker 3:Is it about British people or just kind of British culture and stuff?
Speaker 2:like that Anything.
Speaker 3:Well before COVID happened and you know when you could go outside and stuff. I didn't like the fact that it was just so multicultural and you know people are open to new people, new ideas and just kind of like this constant evolution and conversation going about whatever you know. The topic of the day is so just kind of openness of people where you know nothing, nothing's off the table in a sense.
Speaker 2:I guess we have to stress that you live in London, right?
Speaker 3:Yes, that's again true. So yeah, maybe it might be different in some like small towns, small villages.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and what is it that you absolutely dislike about the country and the people? If there is a thing that you dislike, well, I suppose this is to.
Speaker 3:What I just said is a bit like this two sides to this story, we, what about? We just chatted how, in the past few years, though, everything has become so politicized, so now it might be a generational thing, maybe I don't know, but yeah, everything's just kind of like you're either in this camp or that camp now. So I feel like everything that I did like is slowly might be slowly shifting.
Speaker 2:Which is again interesting.
Speaker 3:But you know, you kind of have to see how the current climate is, for example, last just sorry last year, I'd say 2020, where you had this kind of like a people of change in a sense, where you had a lot of people coming together to have protests for whether it's Black Lives Matter or climate change. Slowly it seems like it's shifting and everyone's just becoming like a bit more afraid of one another maybe.
Speaker 2:And obviously, like you went to as we discussed, you went to English school, so you have a full British education and your English language skills are perfect. But do people still recognize you might be having, like, any type of accent?
Speaker 3:No, not really. I struggle to remember the last time I had someone point out, but that's because, for some weird reason, I mimic accents. So, for example, if I was to be talking to an Irish person, I'd start talking with an Irish accent for some reason. And it's not to piss them off, it's just like a sponge effect.
Speaker 2:That's maybe also because you were so immersed in the language when you were a kid that you just took it all in.
Speaker 3:Maybe I never thought of languages as being my thing, or still do, but yeah, there was a lot of it. It was just a vast consumption of books, tv, music, movies and stuff. You begin sounding like the things you read and the things you hear, and you mimic and replicate those sounds.
Speaker 2:Well, now that you're mentioning movies and books and everything, I have to say that you are an aspiring writer yourself and you currently work for a huge film like very successful film studio in London and you work as a script reader, so you read scripts for them. But in another 20 years, will you still be sipping your cappatis in London or do you plan to try your luck?
Speaker 3:someplace else. I'll probably try my luck, mainly due to climate change and stuff. But see what's available in 20 years. But, like we discussed before, not feeling like I'm from Lithuania or not feeling like I'm from here Always gives you this kind of you know, maybe freedom where you can just be like, oh, I can still like pick where my home actually can be. So I doubt I will be here in 20 years, plus, obviously, brexit and stuff. That's never nice.
Speaker 2:Yeah, well, ben, thank you very much for giving us all your insights into being half, I don't know.
Speaker 3:A cut out version of a Brit.
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly, that's exactly what you are and yeah, well, it's been amazing to have you as a guest. Thank you so much.
Speaker 3:Thank you for having me Well.
Speaker 2:thank you to everyone who's listened to this episode and I'll see you next week. Bye.